the nuts and bolts of you

and it is awesome…that is all.

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Sorry for the long delays!  Between job changes and being busy in general, I was a little too occupied.  But the blog is back!

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There are going to be many times in your life, both professional and personal where you will reach a crossroads.  Sometimes it can back you into a corner and you aren’t left with many options.  No matter what, always stand for what you believe in.  If it costs you a relationship or a job for saying the right thing, or disagreeing with tact, then you know you were in the wrong place to begin with.

This holds especially true at work.  There are always bobble heads that agree with any and every thing their superior says and don’t ever take a stance.  Pay close attention when you are around those folks and see how it makes you feel.  It’s actually kind of pathetic to see, and it happens all too frequently.

The 24 hour rule does apply in most occassions though.  Develop and collect your thoughts and sleep on them to make sure that you aren’t making an emotional decision or reaction.  A lot of times standing up for what you believe in or know is right can make you feel that you did the wrong thing, but you’ll be the one sleeping at night…not the bobble head.  Don’t compromise your morals, ethics, or beliefs and be honest to everyone…including yourself.

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NEVER make decisions based on assumptions.  Assuming that others have done their due diligence or something that they were responsible for is a big mistake.  Clear communication is very important in the workplace and a 30 second phone call to clarify things can make a huge difference.  Brief emails and phone calls are essential.

“The least questioned assumptions are often the most questionable.”
Paul Broca

Assumptions are also detrimental to your personal life.  The more you examine your assumptions, the more you’ll learn.  It can open you up to new cultures, ideas, beliefs, norms, people and relationships.

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It’s very easy to use your fork as a primitive sawing tool, but if you have to cut anything, use a knife. Many companies actually use a lunch or a dinner as an interview to evaluate a candidate’s manners, etiquette, and professionalism.

Practice does indeed make perfect. For those of us who did Cotillion when we were younger (which I did not), this may come natural, but for many it does require work. There is a very incredible book called The Little Book of Etiquette that can save your life. It’s small enough to keep in your coat pocket and you can have a quick refresher in the rest room, parking lot, or at stop lights on the way to the big business dinner.

There is also an extraordinary amount of networking that takes place at lunch and dinner functions, so be prepared and on your best behavior. Many folks will laugh this off and file it in the unimportant category, but it will bite you eventually. You don’t have to be the person with the best etiquette at the table, but you need to try to be in the 80th percentile. Eating with etiquette isn’t so easy a caveman could do it, so brush up please.

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Character is what you do when no one is watching, but someone is.

James Miles sums it up nicely, “you can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.”

If you are a different person once you put on your suit and leave for that big interview, you’re in big trouble. Everyone probably has their favorite character quote memorized, but they’re true because being someone you aren’t won’t last forever. In your quest climbing each rung of the ladder, the janitor can be just as important as the CEO. Ultimately, just carry yourself professionally all the time. you’ll eventually cross paths with someone acting as a gatekeeper in your life that has seen you on your worst behavior…hopefully that won’t keep you from getting that big interview.

“One’s true worth is measured by the ability to do alone what one could do in public.”
François de La Rochefoucauld

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Eye contact is more important than taking detailed notes.

We all know THAT guy. The one who can’t summarize, paraphrase or think intelligently without writing everything down. Stop it. Seriously. There is nothing more frustrating than trying to talk someone through something that is mission critical and see them trying to write things down word for word.

Hay guise!!! This is important because I can read all my notes later!

If your eyes and mind are focused on relaying notes, you’re no more important than a voice recorder, or typewriter. Make good eye contact, nod if you understand things, and by all means learn to take good notes. It will save you time and help you in your career, as well as alleviating stress on your wrist that some would blame on other activities.

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Carry a nice pen, portfolio, and business cards everywhere you go.

It’s a small world folks. Start keeping up with how many times you run into someone and wish you had something to write with, or wish you had a business card. There are numerous times where a missed opportunity could have greatly improved your professional or personal life.

Just be prepared, your mother would be proud of you if nothing else.

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